I have to say, that if I had to pick my biggest struggle in the Christian life, I think it is worry. It's so easy to justify worry, but really, it is sin. It is not trusting God to do what He says he will do, and I have to remind myself of that daily. Since getting pregnant this time, right after miscarrying, and then finding out it was twins, I have really learned that worry is a tool that the devil is good at using. I have worked really hard at reminding myself through scripture and well, looking back at my entire life, that God is in control. There are no surprises or mistakes with Him, and He promised me He will provide. Today, we got to see that in a big way, and I just have to share!
When we found out I was pregnant, we knew we needed a bigger car than our two door cavalier, but we didn't have a way to just go buy one. Sure, we could probably get approved for a car loan, but for one: we took Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University--it changed our lives and one of the things it made us not want to have ever again was a car payment, and for two: we don't actually have any money for a car payment. True story. So, we figured out that if we could hold off until tax time next year, we could buy a used mini van outright and we were happy with that solution. Then, we found out that we weren't just having one baby. And, not only that, but my younger sister moved in with us. Well, let's see, that makes a total of six bodies (three car seats!) that we may have to fit into a vehicle at one time...in a five seat, two door cavalier. That clearly wouldn't last us until February of next year. haha. Neither Ben or I freaked out when we found out about the twins, we were excited from the moment we found out, but the car was one of the first things we both brought up. We knew God had known about these babies from the start, and He knows exactly what car we have and what finances we have, so we have just kept telling each other that He had to have a bigger car for us somehow. I'm not going to lie and act like I've kept it all together everyday. Trust me, I had a meltdown or two telling God that He needed to figure this out and soon because, how are we supposed to fit all those car seats in the back of the cavalier to even get home from the hospital?! And then I would be firmly reminded that He doesn't have to tell me what He has planned, I just have to trust. A bigger car is a need now, not a want, and He promised to supply all of my needs.
Well, Ben has worked all the jobs and side jobs he can. He's applied and been on so many interviews these past few months its ridiculous, but we still are not ahead. We've been racking our brains to figure out what we could make work, and just praying like crazy. A month and a half ago, someone posted a van on fb and I asked the lady to message me if the people ahead of me fell through. It seemed decent, it was older, but not too bad, and they wanted an okay amount for it. I thought maybe there was some way we could make it work, but I never got a message. (Or so I thought...)
Then, last month another lady posted a van on fb and my friend Karen pointed it out. I called Ben right away and then messaged her and got our husbands in contact. It looked much nicer than the previous van, it was a little more expensive, but not much and they had OBO listed with it. The guy brought it to PepBoys where Ben works the next day and let Ben and the mechanics check it out. It was very well taken care of, super clean, new tires, and only had a handful of minor things wrong that just come with the age of the vehicle. Ben decided to offer him a lower amount than even the first van was listed at, and told him that he still needed to talk to me. Well, we still didn't have cash on hand, and that really bothered me, but, we did have the availability to finance the amount on credit for 0% interest and we still will have the full amount to pay it off with our tax return. We talked and prayed about it, and decided that we would tell them that we wanted it, but it would take us two weeks to get the money (waiting on the transfer and all that) and see if they still wanted to take our lower offer. That way, we gave God the chance to close the door if we were just forcing it to work. Much to my surprise, I got a message from the lady that night telling me that they were more than willing to do that for us, that they were going on vacation but they would just take it off fb, keep it in the garage and call us when they got back. Plus, she sent me more pictures (I hadn't gotten to see it in person) and told me she would love for us to have it for our twins instead of some random guy who would turn it into a work truck. I was floored, and so entirely relieved! And the best part? I somehow never noticed that the other person who had the previous van on fb had indeed messaged me about their van and I never saw it! Talk about God guiding us to the right choice!
Well, today we met up at the Currency Exchange and bought our van. Not only is it as nice as it is in the pictures, but this family was extremely kind and generous. They insisted on giving us the GPS they used with it, it has a tv (with a VCR, lol!), they remembered that they had a remote starter for it and found it for us (what?!) AND ended up giving us $100 back after we paid for the title and registration as a "baby gift"! I seriously almost cried, and I am so beyond thankful that God worked this all out. We are having all the little things fixed on it later this week and all of it still cost us much less than I was ever imagining we'd have to spend--especially for such a nice vehicle. It seriously leaves us in the position to most likely still be able to pay off the van debt and all the rest of our credit card debt that we have been working on with our tax refund. Words cannot express how incredibly thankful I am to serve such an amazing God. I am so glad we kept our heads on straight and trusted Him to provide, it couldn't be any more perfect! :)
THANK YOU times a million to everyone who has prayed, it is AMAZING to see God work and I just had to share!! :)